{"id":1787,"date":"2009-07-06T11:08:16","date_gmt":"2009-07-06T15:08:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.moviefanfare.com\/?p=1787"},"modified":"2014-02-11T11:46:41","modified_gmt":"2014-02-11T16:46:41","slug":"mega-shark-versus-giant-octopus-does-it-live-up-to-its-trailer","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.moviefanfare.com\/?p=1787","title":{"rendered":"Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus: Does It Live Up To Its Trailer?"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Mega<\/p>\n

After Susan Boyle’s TV debut\u00a0and the piano-playing cat, the biggest Internet video sensation this spring had to be the trailer for a\u00a0\u00a0sci-fi\/action movie named Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus<\/a>.\u00a0 Looking like the ‘roided-up love child of Jaws<\/a> and It Came from Beneath the Sea<\/a>,\u00a0and boasting\u00a0late 20th-century celebrities Deborah “Don’t Call Me Debbie” Gibson and Lorenzo “Don’t Call Me Renegade”\u00a0Lamas as its leads, the preview’s presence on MTV’s website led some to think the whole\u00a0thing was a publicity hoax\u00a0for the MTV Movie Awards. Once it was determined that it was in fact an actual film, the\u00a0buzz\u00a0only intensified. After all,\u00a0Mega Shark is seen leaping out of the ocean to\u00a0take a bite out of\u00a0a passenger jet in\u00a0mid-flight! The only question on everyone’s mind was “Can this movie possibly be as good as the trailer\u00a0makes it seem?”<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

Well, in order to answer that, let’s calmly and objectively weigh the pluses and minuses of MSVGO (CAUTION: SPOILERS AHEAD):<\/p>\n

1. The film does indeed star a Mega Shark and a Giant Octopus, two ridiculously oversized prehistoric predators\u00a0whom the pseudonymous writer\/director would have us believe were flash frozen in mid-combat (probably over\u00a0some sports rivalry) millions of years ago.\u00a0 +PLUS FOR THE SHOUT-OUT TO DINOSAURUS<\/a>.<\/p>\n

2. Gibson plays a brillant, system-bucking marine researcher (a concept\u00a0falling on the Hollywood Female Scientist Believability Scale somewhere between Raquel Welch<\/a> in\u00a0Fantastic Voyage<\/a> and Denise Richards<\/a> in The World Is Not Enough<\/a>) who, along with her Artie Lange-like sidekick, is following whales along\u00a0the Alaska coast in a mini-sub she “borrowed” from the institute that employs her. -MINUS FOR GIBSON PILOTING ANYTHING.<\/p>\n

3. As luck and plot advancement would have it, a nearby secret military experiment drops a sonar device into the water that sends the frenzied whales\u00a0crashing into a glacier wall,\u00a0freeing and somehow thawing out the title terrors. Soon (really rather unbelievably soon, considering the distances involved), GO wrecks a Japanese oil drilling platform\u00a0and MS is\u00a0chomping down on whales–and, just like the trailer teased, an honest-to-gosh\u00a0Boeing 747!–in the Pacific near California.\u00a0\u00a0+++PLUS FOR MEGA SHARK’S\u00a0IN-FLIGHT MEAL.<\/p>\n

4.\u00a0Gibson, her old college professor,\u00a0and\u00a0a overly-philosophical Japanese scientist\u00a0arrived to study\u00a0GO’s chowdown\u00a0are taken into custody\u00a0and held in a military\u00a0\u00a0“installation” (which the same sunglasses-and-camo-clad, gun-toting actor stands in front of in every shot), where wisecracking, ponytailed government official Lorenzo Lamas\u00a0browbeats them into helping\u00a0come up with a way to stop the creatures. –MINUS FOR LAMAS’ DEMEANOR AND FOR THE SHOTS OF THE DIRECTOR’S PAL AS THE GUARD.<\/p>\n

5. When nothing else\u00a0inspires them, an out-of-left-field makeout session in a supply closet–and the discussion of love and attraction that follows–between Gibson and the Japanese\u00a0scientist helps them think of using pheremone sprays to draw each critter\u00a0to where it can be contained\u00a0(as the old prof says to Lamas, “Those guys have been frozen in ice for millions of years. Wouldn’t you be a little horny?”). \u00a0–MINUS FOR THE PSUEDOSCIENCE AND FOR GIBSON KEEPING TOO MANY CLOTHES ON.<\/p>\n

6. When Operation: Love Connection fails–badly, with a still-horny MS taking out his frustration by jumping out of San Francisco Bay and biting a chunk out of the Golden Gate Bridge!–Gibson suggests Plan B, a “Thrilla in Manilla” where they’ll lure them back up north and “get them to kill each other.”\u00a0\u00a0+++PLUS FOR MEGA SHARK’S MOUTHFUL\u00a0 OF\u00a0“BRIDGEWORK.”<\/p>\n

7. During an undersea chase, with\u00a0the main cast in a submarine\u00a0trying to reach an undersea ravine before MS swallows them, the sub’s panicky\u00a0pilot goes all Crimson Tide<\/a> and pulls out a gun for a\u00a0ridiculously artifcial 90 seconds of suspense. -MINUS FOR THE SHAMEFULLY OBVIOUS BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR OSCAR BID.<\/p>\n

8. Much like\u00a0previous creature double features\u00a0King Kong vs. Godzilla, Alien vs. Predator and…uh, Kramer vs. Kramer, MS and GO are hardly together onscreen\u00a0until the climatic showdown, when they’re seen bloodied and sinking down into the depths (not unlike Leonardo DiCaprio in Titanic). Meanwhile, Gibson, her new boyfriend, and her mentor survive to run off and investigate a new aquatic mystery in the North Sea (Mega Herring?), and Lamas survives to wonder why he ever took this role. \u00a0—-MINUS FOR THE AMBIGUOUS ENDING, THE THREAT OF A SEQUEL, AND FOR NOT HAVING GIBSON SING THE SONG OVER THE CLOSING CREDITS.<\/p>\n

So, does MSVGO live up to its trailer? No, of course not! I mean, come on, just look at that\u00a0name again. How could any motion picture\u00a0crafted by man or woman possibly live up to such a title (and mind you, the film’s studio’s recent slate\u00a0 included\u00a0Snakes on a Train, The Day the Earth Stopped and Transmorphers: Fall of Man)?\u00a0\u00a0Even so, this high-concept howlfest is worth considering\u00a0for fans of “so bad it’s good”\u00a0cinema. Might I suggest sushi instead of popcorn?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

After Susan Boyle’s TV debut\u00a0and the piano-playing cat, the biggest Internet video sensation this spring had to be the trailer for a\u00a0\u00a0sci-fi\/action movie named Mega Shark versus Giant Octopus.\u00a0 Looking like the ‘roided-up love child of Jaws and It Came…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":1858,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[34],"tags":[1351,1508],"coauthors":[1720],"class_list":["post-1787","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-staff-notes","tag-horror-movie-reviews","tag-science-fiction-movies"],"yoast_head":"\nMega Shark Vs. 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